Synchronicities Upon Synchronicities Upon …

Many of us who are “awake” that is, existing in a state where we are paying attention to both our inner and outer worlds, have noticed a multitude of synchronicities. At first it can be a little confusing and almost unsettling. I like to think of synchronicities as little signposts that allow you to test, validate and realize you are indeed interacting with your environment, rather than just being acted upon.

When I was in my early years of what I like to call “discernment training”, my guides would do things like tell me to go into a coffee shop at precisely 4:10, sit in the second seat to the right, drink one cup of coffee and then leave. Sometimes there would be “events”, conversations, teachable moments and other times it was simply a lesson in listening to my Higher Self, “obeying God” to use a different vernacular. I found that listening often gave me an opportunity to brighten someone’s day, holding the door open for someone, smiling, saying hello, helping an old lady across the street type stuff. These things make the world go ‘round way more than people realize. They leave many footprints and evidence of compassion, connection and love.

We often consider these synchronicities as coming from “above” or planted and planned by others, but the easiest way to really get at the heart of the matter is in understanding the nature of our planet. We assume the talk of spiritual matters is somehow separate from the talk of earthly matters. They are one and the same. Those codes, signposts, and triggers your body senses and alerts the mind to, is often the spirit of the planet (of which you are a part) interacting with you.

One of my early tune in’s to numbers happened to be a repeating set I barely remember anymore. I’d see them everywhere, popping out at me like a neon sign. Once I finally set my mind to investigate, I looked the sequence up, just plugged the numbers right into Google and the results turned up titanium. The numbers I was seeing related to the atomic number and a few other attributes of titanium. It was a few years after my last surgery in which titanium was implanted in my lower back. Apparently, my cells were letting me know what they were sensing.

I see these things as a communication tool. Our body, after so long being neglected, is finding new ways to get us to pay attention. Mother earth is assisting, our angels and guides are assisting, all in an effort to get us to wake from the trance, the stupor, the ignorance.

My whole life seems to be one giant synchronicity. Levels and layers and beacons …it gets mind boggling sometimes. I remember the day a few years back where it felt like there was a giant antenna coming out of the top of my head, reaching into the heavens. Now that I know what I do about titanium, this begins to make a lot more sense. I can’t tell you how many times that song by Sia helped me get through a level, a hardship, a challenge.

I watched a video about the Mandela effect the other day and the woman was freaking out about a logo changing color after she said something about a logo changing color asking if the Mandela effect was sentient and responding to her. Somehow the message hasn’t been made clear and it would seem people are afraid of their own co-creative abilities. Dear, dear lady, you haven’t seen anything yet. It’s been a long while since mama has been free to communicate and we have been free enough to hear. The bible says the rocks themselves will call out. It can be weird because we have been taught this planet teeming with life is somehow not alive itself. It is. It just uses a different language. And while there are false synchs and traps at times, the thing to remember is that nothing on planet earth does not contain an element of earth, which means, on the quantum level everything can be traced back to God, Source, The Creator. It took me a while to accept that.

Sometimes the synchronicities can lead to ego imbalance. And by that I mean, create a sense of entitlement, negating all other beings, without whom, there would be nothing to synch with. Let me give you an example. In one of my last blog posts I mentioned sink holes. Lo and behold today I read an article about a sink hole appearing on the white house lawn. This, on the heels of a powwow I was able to attend which turned out to be the 33rd annual, the theme was “in honor of our children”. Our Mother, like our Father, has a great sense of humor but also… doesn’t play around when it comes to certain things. One of those things is assuring their children that they are loved, heard, their efforts appreciated. But just like we give and love and support our kids, and don’t want them turning into spoiled brats, those same forces that can give with abundance can also take with abundance. It is always wise to keep oneself anchored in reality, which is to say in harmony with these forces. Honor and accept your role and place but don’t use it to diminish others. That’s the lesson I have heard most loudly.

I used to worry about this creative ability. Like, what if someone uses it to harm others, what if I make a mistake, what if someone creates something horrible we can’t get rid of!!!? To my understanding, the ability to create gets bigger, more pronounced as you mature. Your intentions are clear. This is why we do the work. This is why we clean out our closets, we ask to be renewed, we seek guidance and understanding. Because with great power, comes great responsibility.

There is an important full moon coming up. May 29th. It is the flower moon or honey moon and it is in 8 degrees Sagittarius. My name relates to honey and bees and I am a Sagittarius. The number 29 also carries great significance. I have a big window of opportunity here to anchor in something I’ve been wanting to do for a great long while, a homestead, a headquarters, a team and a place to heal and train the next generation of healers, make art and maybe even do a little fishing. It’s time. I am ready. But I am also able to transfer some of this abundance on to others. Do write down the things you would like to see in the world, ways to make life just a little bit better for others and let’s see how many people we can lift up with all this help pouring in.

Many blessings and big, big love.


Prophecy & Stuff

It is interesting… we pass through “portals”, levels of understanding, notches on the great wheel of time’s belt and the coming back together with an amplified amount of Light, can be quite revealing. Such has been my case with this latest round so I’d like to take a stab at explaining where I am at in my understanding of prophecy.

Fate, destiny, will, prophecy. Spirit, Soul, Ascension, mortality. The four-fold testament and the eight arms of the human seeking transcendence.

Like the story of the examination of the elephant (which is symbolic of memory), we can each take a hold of some or other part and though looking at history, (that is to say, a thing already made), proclaim it as prophecy, as evidence of the future. Are you reading from old scripts and thinking it something new?

We all know that for quite a long time we have been staring down the barrel of prophecy. Prophecy that says you have been cursed to toil, if you work, you earn money, if you earn money, you get food, shelter and clothing. Prophecies that describe through myopic views, the cycles of physical creation. Prophecy that says there are ne’er do wells among us that will one day face the wrath of God. Prophecies that describe an anti-christ and a return of Jesus. Within these prophecies there are many more layers, and a multitude of definitions.

If you are able to expand your perspective, you can sense where they all lead… a desire to reconnect with pure consciousness (from which your physical being arose and therefore is not separate from except that you forget this because you are assessing the situation from the perspective of the physical). Since this already exists within you, immutably, there is no path you need to take to get there. It is a remembering, an awakening. Some people may want to take the scenic path to this truth, and that’s ok. There have been many a composer of paths. But you also have the ability to say the path you are taking is the path of a Divine Being and because YOU ARE A DIVINE BEING you’d be right! But so many people really want to know how that one story ends….

I had an interaction with a dude on youtube that fits in nicely with these ponderings and makes sense in light of how these latest energies seem to be kicking up a lot of the past, ghosts being released if you will, memories and shoulda, coulda, woulda’s have been surfacing for healing, for purifying. Here’s what he said to me:

Aether Phoenix

How Much Of This Do You “Truly” Understand? The Level I Am At Alone Is Not According To Mortal Standards, I Do Hope You Are Aware Of That. The Things I Am Telling You Through My Work, Nobody On This Planet Can Teach You. Not Even I Could, If It Was Not For The True Mother GQD Directly Relaying This Information To Me, So I Can Write It Down For You And Others. If You Have Any Questions And The Will To Advance Your Understanding Of Everything, Do Feel Free To Ask Me.

Is it just me or did that motherfucker try to curse me into believing he has some key to immortality or understanding that I do not? He calls his god a mother but he must have a very poor view of women and motherhood if he has come to believe a good mother would ever burden one of her children with too much food, while the others went hungry. A sibling might steal the food off your plate when your mom’s not looking, maybe even blame mom and really confuse the fuck out of you but that just makes this whole thing even funnier (if you feel like looking up the word sibyl or the story about Joseph and his brothers found in Genesis 37, it will shed more light on this).

Let me elucidate my understanding of the number 8, cause the number 8 is connected to a lot of the purging that is occurring. There are 8 legs on a spider. A spider weaves webs. A spider weaves webs to catch prey. It is the nature of a spider to do so. An octopus has 8 legs, when an octopus is scared, it releases ink. It is an octopus’ nature to do so. Often it would appear that humans use this ability, the eight arms of the human seeking transcendence in an attempt to catch God. We weave our tales hoping that God or Truth as it were, will be caught in our net and finally we will have that sucker stuck somewhere so we can finally observe Its nature (or control Its nature).

Can you see how we do this? Jesus said, the Father and I are one. Isn’t it true, also, that the path of enlightenment is to come to the realization that all is indeed one? So, who then is being caught in the stories we weave? Must we always toil our lives away seeking to put words and numbers and ideas to the ineffable when in truth the ineffable lives within us? If you know yourself only by the past, by what you have done, or what has been said, codes and scripts written long ago, where then is your will?

Our Divine Eternal Nature will always resist the boundaries of form. This is the part that I encourage you to access, to accept so that you do not find yourself filling up someone else’s idea or container or role and, thinking you have now finally come to understand yourself, end up having to wonder why it is you still feel the urge to destroy the fucking container.

As we play with the concepts of multiple layers of definition, don’t forget that within you also exists that which has never been and can never be defined. Uncorrupted purity. The eternal soul that does not seek to create, define or limit by any means. This aspect of awareness, of consciousness has no need to experience anything. There is nothing that could be experienced that would or could mirror the absence of all experience. The ego creates because the ego wants to experience and then define the experience, but pure consciousness is separate from all of those stories, it cannot be trapped in the web because the web only exists in time and time cannot be used to define “no time” no matter how hard you try.

Look at it this way, maybe you don’t know how to build a road yet so you drive on one that is already paved. How do you know that the person who created that road did not in fact make one big giant looping piece of roadwork that always leads you right back to where you started? How do you know that the road you have always reliably driven on might not in fact lead to a cliff one day, what was once reliable now covered in lava or a sinkhole? How do you know that the road you are on due to someone else’s direction, is not some labyrinth that does nothing but waste your time when there was a much shorter road that you could have taken?

Prophecy is like that. It is like a road between two points. The points already exist as potentials. Me laying down a path between the two does not create the two, nor does the path define the only way to connect the two.  Once the words are laid down, the creation already exists in the past. In this way, prophecy, like time, is not moving forward, it is moving backwards.

Returning to, turning your own awareness to, the infinite awareness, helps when we are faced with so many roads and maps and definitions. To be or not to be, to define or not to define, they are both irrelevant because you are. Why assume you don’t know what you’re doing?

There are many gods of the physical but they all come from the same Source, as do you. The ego will take credit for everything it sees because it identifies (rightly so) with the defining line. But we all know that the line that is drawn in the shape of a circle does not define what is contained within the circle. If I take a piece of paper and draw a circle on it, and then take a bucket of water and spill it on that drawn circle, the water won’t give a single shit about staying in those boundaries I have drawn. Be wary of people who take credit for stories that have been told in a thousand different ways, the roaring lion walking about, seeking whom (who’s time and energy) it may devour.

I can tell you God told me that flower over there is going to bloom on the 23rd day of the month and when the flower blooms on the 23rd day of the month you may look at me and say, oh wow, this person must really be talking to God and if I was an asshole I could then use that “oh wow” moment to tell you how to run your life. You may be so enamored at the thought of someone catching “God” in a web, you may ignore important and relevant facts. Maybe I’ve been paying a lot of attention to what makes a flower bloom. Maybe I’ve been watching this same flower bloom for decades, maybe everyone in my family for the last two thousand years has been watching this flower bloom and recording the dates, temperatures and so on so none of our children and grandchildren would miss it. Maybe I built a giant wall so that no one but my family knows this flower exists. Maybe I could convince someone I am surely a magician by placing you next to the flower right before it’s about to bloom and saying, abra cadabra I will now make this flower bloom and when it does right on schedule, you might think I have extraordinary powers.

Food for thought anyways. People living in the past will look at you living in the now and believe they are staring at the future and if that future does not line up with their predictions, they might get a little uncomfortable about how much time they’ve been spending swiveling their heads like an owl. Grace and Mercy, no matter how long you study the past or plot the future, are unpredictable. Creation and chaos are best buds, this is why most people cling to pain and suffering and the predictability of death. Some things bear repeating: Choose Life.

Targeted Change

I’ve never been one to enjoy competition. Competition creates winners and losers and tends to be lonely fun for the winners. I’ve attempted to avoid it as much as possible. By walking away. By remaining silent. By not playing. I now have a resistance to it, a filter buried within that has this little radar that goes off in the presence of someone seeking to feed their ego by way of competition. Our culture is built on it. My radar goes off a lot.

I had two instances of “targeted activity” directed at me the day before yesterday. And before someone minimizes or dismisses what I am saying by way of “law of attraction” let me be clear, you can’t attract something that doesn’t exist, and ignoring painful realities does nothing to transmute or heal them. I’m a firm believer in bringing things to the Light. It exists and I didn’t create it. I am observing, reporting and creating a pathway towards solution. Some of them aren’t so interested in being left behind. “But you’re not important enough to target”. I know, right!? I must just be crazy. But maybe, just maybe, my crazy will help someone. I can roll with that. Can you?

It isn’t just the “government” spying on people, anyone who has enough money is doing it. There have been algorithms designed to track, which prompt certain other actions. Some of those “other actions” can be employed through smart phones. They are most effective through phones held by children who do not have the spiritual or auric integrity to offer resistance or “filter” the frequency signal emitted. It isn’t fun, but a lot of it is automated, activated by certain key words or phrases and not necessarily personal (i.e. you don’t have to be “important”)…kinda like a very aggressive firewall protecting certain things. Nerd stuff. And just like the nerd stuff that contributed to the use of atomic weapons, I don’t think they necessarily signed up for nor had the foresight to see what this has become. (And yes you should limit your child’s access to smart phones just like all of the tech giant inventor geniuses have said to.)

Money is the root of all evil they say. Is it money or the competition attached to it, the lack matrix, the limited world view where money (rather than health) is the carrot used for all endeavors to motivate humans? Would the competition exist if money didn’t exist? That’s probably a good question to examine. Either way, we have been living in a world which has proclaimed “he with the greatest bank account” the winner. Does it matter how many people were destroyed in the process? No. Does it matter how many times the rules are changed to benefit some and limit others? No. Win at all costs has been the norm for a while and the costs, in case it isn’t clear, is life. Human life. Spiritual Life. Our planet’s life.

What has the winner historically received? A free pass from the struggle? An oasis and throne separated from the agreements that come with being part of human society? Maybe it’s time we create a society that doesn’t need escaping from.

The “matrix” is a competition trap, a literal hunger game scenario that has affected each and every one of us and there is massive healing yet to be done. This has been shown (disclosed) through several movies but the truth still seems a bit too far beyond possible for most to accept, especially for those who don’t relate to “hungry”. The market is the market, where goods are bought, sold, distributed. The competition to capitalize on this without actually adding any value… that is another story entirely, the “real life” SIMS game that plays in the background and shadows.

Competition in and of itself, like money, is not a bad thing. I remember when I was a kid, we’d have these relay races at school. My best friend was way faster than me. She and I would often race but when she went against one of the boys instead, her times were always way faster. She had to try harder to beat them. There is a motivating factor tied to competition that shouldn’t be disregarded. But this particular competition so many are engaged in, has cost many lives and continues to increase rather than decrease suffering. They have forgotten that the goal of something like “Wall street” was not to cause harm but to provide a means to fuel, inspire and fund innovation. But I would be lying if I did not also admit it was/is part of the “experiment”.

All of the unnatural plays we see orchestrated to fix or impact the market, the movies, tv shows, social structures, news reports, commercials that affect people’s emotion, impact the market, now they openly track every move you make, how you respond, what your sign is, to predict (or “stack”) the market. You’re living in the SIMS more often than anyone cares to know. People like to blame it on greed. This has gone way past greed.

It is addiction. It is addiction to the surge of chemicals your body releases when you get a victory. And the sexual stimulation that occurs when you engage in sneaky, risky or deviant behavior. Ask any recovering addict. The behaviors of addicts include lying, denial, manipulation, secrecy, abuse, and blaming others. It can include egregious acts or behaviors that one would normally not engage in because without the addiction (in the control seat), they would find it morally reprehensible.

The other ways we can solve these problems besides treating the addicts, is to change what “winning” means. Negotiating a fair deal, that is winning. Creating products that will improve all life for three generations down the road, that is winning. Reducing irresponsible use of machines, that is winning. Increasing development, opportunity, and community, that is winning. Remaining grounded in compassion for one another, that is winning. Solving any number of the problems facing humanity rather than getting your pot of gold and hiding in a cave because you’re too afraid you’re going to lose it, that is winning. You’ll know it’s winning because more people will be HAPPY. It’s the difference between masturbating and making love. They both might provide climax, and they both might make you happy, but only one is capable of producing a soul.

We’ll get there one day at a time. There is life beyond the game. There is life beyond the social constructs that place us against each other rather than for each other. And just as I can see the “reasons why” behind the addict living on the street, I can see the “reasons why” behind the addict playing the game to fund his way out of society. It is compassion that is needed, not resentment, villainizing and condemnation.

And if we have to hold your hand through every one of these twelve steps… let me introduce you to step two. “We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” Most people hear this and think it means giving power away to a separate external being. It doesn’t. The “ourselves” that is being talked about is the false self, the addicted self, the needy and thirsty self, the hungry ghost. It represents the “mind” that was indoctrinated to believe success had nothing to do with discovering your authentic self but earning enough money to buy power or control and then directing/programming the body to perform certain actions to that end. Your higher mind, your authentic self, the gifts yet undiscovered that you bring to the table … these are your power source and they are free.

Maybe you’ve already passed this step… let me remind you, then, of steps 8 and 9. Step Eight: Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all (you should include yourself on that list). Step Nine: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. There are many projects that need funding and since there is also an extreme lack of accountability and oversight in local government, it looks to me like the Universe has provided an excellent opportunity for making amends. Take it and create a society you don’t want to escape from.

That Veil tho’

You know what those old vinyl records look like? You’d put the needle down and it would play. If you came to a song you didn’t want to hear, you picked the needle up and gently placed it at the beginning of the next song. When CD’s came around, if a song came on you didn’t like, you just had to push one button or maybe you only had one favorite and you could just skip ahead to that one, ignoring all others. Now we can design our own algorithms on certain music playing sites and a playlist we might enjoy pops up, allowing a song we may have never even heard of, to enter our listening pleasure.

Those of us who grew up in the age of vinyls, sometimes have to work a little harder at remembering that this new way of interacting with music can be quite enjoyable. This is a pretty good take on what it’s like to be out of the timeloops.

It can be frustrating sometimes, watching people put that old vinyl record on, especially when that one song you just can’t stand comes on and they don’t know how to move the needle without scratching the record so they just let the bullshit fill the room. This happens a lot in the “truther” community. Some of them really like to play that same old sad song over and over and over. You can tell them, hey, you can create your own playlists now, to which they will often reply, no, no, no that shit will program you, this sad song is where it’s at. And oh to have the power to destroy that fucking record and know I must resist the urge to do so because … headphones work just as well.

This is where I let a lot of shit go, a lot of people and a lot of realities I’m just done looking at. And as is my way, this is triggered by a resonant call for healing. So let me tell you a part of my story, the record I will be breaking with this writing. If I lived in Hawaii, I’d be throwing this shit right into the lava, make no mistake.

Four years ago, I had to rescue my son from hell. Though I had made many numerous attempts to address the suffering and trauma I had lived through as a young child, the pain bled out, it colored his world, he sought escape from it. Guess what was waiting with arms wide open. Sometimes we don’t realize what we have created or invited or allowed until it threatens our last remnant of sanity, hope, love. The story is a long one and I already wrote that book but the lessons I learned on my walk back up may help a few souls.

Four years ago, my world and all its self-destructive beliefs fell into ruins and I had to walk out of hell with my eyes open. Literally. A few things happened then, that have made it a little difficult to fully move on. I haven’t been ready to release them yet, haven’t felt much like talking about it, haven’t yet been ready to forgive myself. And maybe I’m still not, but I’ll tell you one thing I know for sure, the first step in recovery is admitting you have a problem. So many of us are addicted to shame and guilt and hey, you look like an evil motherfucker, here please take my power since I’m not doing anything with it anyways, and HOLY FUCK I want to be done listening to these sad songs.


Of that I am sure. I don’t think I have even one more I’m sorry in me for how much I allowed to go into ruins before I was ready for this truth. So join me as I walk the last few feet down the aisle, where my Father will give me away and I will become married to my own creations and all that comes with it.

Four years ago I killed myself and didn’t die. And when I say “killed myself” I actually mean that. I took enough opioids to kill myself and didn’t die. Tried a few times. Same result. God just kept getting closer and things kept getting weirder. Jesus wasn’t kidding but that doesn’t mean you’re going to be strong enough to walk out of wherever you left yourself so don’t be stupid, let my story be enough proof.

Around the same time, my boyfriend had an experience that has haunted me way too much. Somewhere in the fields of his imagination, a dude with horns presented him a contract. The contract was basically that he was going to facilitate them siphoning my “gifts” and in return he would be able to get anyone’s talent he wanted. I never thought much of it, honestly, until I had done a solid year’s worth of work on myself and could see massive changes sweeping over my world but I could not get any change to happen in my personal life. I was in a cage. My gifts were not.

Then a friend intervened, got me an attunement and clearing with a very gifted woman and despite being able to intend and create blessings for others hand over fist, I still could not get away from the cage. One day he’d be a regular old boyfriend, the next day, (usually right after I attempted to work on one of the projects that may actually get me out of poverty) he’d fucking destroy me energetically. Over and over and over and over. The contract was dealt with, the positive and silver linings found and embraced with gratitude but yet…

He’s still a portal. Still hasn’t quite found it within himself to do the spiritual work necessary to make sure no harm comes at me through his vehicle. A vast number of healers have worked to release me yet my ability to trust, to walk out, to leave behind the mind games, the gaslighting, the fuck me if you want a place to live, the disempowering and endless yea, but’s … to say goodbye to 4D for once and for all is so much easier said than done.

Just as you can vibrate so low you leave your body, you can also vibrate so high your body can’t take it. I understand why he has done what he’s done. That twin flame thing, it’s never pretty. I’ve been afraid to leave for the same reasons anyone ever stays in a fucked up relationship, we don’t think we deserve better or don’t know how to take the steps to give ourselves better.

So many of us have these massive scars, sad songs, angry songs, confusing distorted songs and believed for so long that the record we have is the record we have, and we play that shit because we think it’s better than no music at all. We fear the silence invoking all those things we have yet to forgive and forget.

WE are all guilty of something, maybe we worked for a company that used earth’s resources irresponsibly, maybe we drive our car more often than we need to, maybe we throw food away and forget how many people are dying because of hunger, maybe we walked past someone and silently cursed them in our head, maybe we pushed our girlfriend or called her a bitch, maybe we wished someone death, maybe we used our big boobs to get what we want, maybe we abused our authority, our trust, our duty and stole money that wasn’t ours, maybe we signed up for the military not realizing, maybe we failed at motherhood and almost got our son and innocent others killed, maybe… we did that.

Did we do these things because a group of fallen angels or negative aliens or greedy humans set us up? Maybe. Does knowing any of that make today any less precious? It doesn’t.

So … today, I stand absolved by the only person capable of granting me full and complete absolution – myself because God, Life, Love has already made it very clear I am worthy of Love, of Life, of God. I now must fully trust and embrace love, grace and sights unseen. I must embrace them with the understanding that the full force of my “Night” side makes Kali look like a fluffy kitten and yet… I was loved. I was rescued. I was shown Grace, Mercy, Compassion because these also reside within me in equal measure. I may not have been able to make peace with all of my aspects but that’s what boundaries are for. The unwritten code regarding forgiveness, you make every effort to never pull that stunt again.

I forgive everyone who couldn’t handle me in all my Divine Power and Glory, including myself.

Thank you -everyone- who has shown me the path of serenity. It has allowed me to truly accept the things I cannot change.

Thank you -everyone- who has cheered from the sidelines and kept me courageous while I change the things I can. Hold on to your hats because it would appear I’m just getting started.

Thank you -everyone- who has offered the tools necessary to cultivate the wisdom to know the difference.

A few years back I said, “Physician, heal thyself”. And sometime within this past week I looked at the Physician and said, oh, you’re finally healed!

Jesus said, Father forgive them for they know not what they do and I was forgiven for what I did when I didn’t know.

Today, to the mother in me and the mother in us all, I say, forgive yourself and your children will never have to, love yourself and your children will know how to do the same. Break that record with the songs you hate and maybe you won’t forget there is another world, there is LIFE beyond suffering.


Starseed ~ Hybrid ~ Anomaly

Hey! It’s Mother’s Day tomorrow! Pretty close to that new moon too and you know what thaaaaat means… this is where I try again to heal that stubborn part of me, connected to things I don’t understand, that remains angry and obstinate for reasons I am afraid to examine.

The breeding programs, the hybrids, the new realms we are entering.

This is a shout out to every mother everywhere affected by such who may not have felt the support and validation needed to integrate, heal and make sense of it all. We are many so I’m going to try to give voice and freedom and healing to all of us whose confusion echoes in the etheric fields of our maternal knowing, our maternal heart. If at first you don’t succeed, try and try and try until you are sure and it is so.

Here we go…. (some me, some channeled, it is what it is. I hear you my brothers and sisters, my children, I hear you and add my voice to yours).

I am calling to the fragments that must be released or integrated. Come home to me now, let’s get real here. We’re all sick of feeling the need to apologize or cow-tow for being weird. And I’m sorry, but some of us break the fucking mold on weird. The blessing and the curse, the vesica piscis, the place in between, the all that and a bag of chips … and the shrug, the whatevs, the when do I get to play?

The fragments that call out “hey we have some memories missing, we’ve been experimented on, tagged, harassed and tracked, and there are parts of my life that are void of validation and healing, because I’m afraid of the full onslaught of memories if I dare to look”. Come. Heal.

Starseed, hybrid, anomaly. That’s not a false ego talking, that’s what I am. My human aspect has, in addition, moved within the Angelic path, holds the keys to some of that rare gold in the Akash having been to Heaven, having many aspects that reside there full time and in unexplainable ways because the Celestial realms defy logic to even the most advanced minds. That’s a lot to try to integrate into an earthly walk where the vast majority of people neither accept the reality of aliens or angels. To accept at once the limits of this human nature that also exists within me and simultaneously revel in the unbound freedom to choose how I create from here with a few extra colors on the spectrum, how to integrate and utilize these aspects of my soul, which is the gift of being a divine human. Yep. It’s a lot. Know you are not alone!

Usually when I say “experimented on” people go to that place written about in movies, the predictive programming that relays the message “aliens abducted you and did horrible things against your will.” No. That is not the experiments I speak of. I am talking about the experiments run by big pharma and western medicine, the beneficiaries of such are the dudes I still need to forgive. Any results that could be considered helpful do not outweigh the cost, the harm incurred and still occurring. The amount of money they make off this unholy bullshit represents the closest thing to my heaven they will experience. It is the key I use to forgive them and hold compassion where anger wishes to grow. I am willing to forgive and that’s something.

Many hybrids are rather aggressively used in this manner and it can make it especially cumbersome to navigate beyond fear to incorporate your extra-terrestrial origins. Those “abductions” people are so fearful of, are usually orchestrated and conducted by humans just to set that record straight. When I speak of hybridization, I’m not talking about an abduction scenario. Though the memories are still quite unclear, I know that part of the reason I was a candidate is because I was born with the cord wrapped around my neck. The likelihood of my survival without the intervention I was given is pretty close to zero. That I also came into a family with a strong foundation in spiritual wisdom and psychic acuity, which could support and contribute to my being able to eventually accept myself, was another mark in my favor. There were other reasons, some of which aren’t relevant to the healing I’m trying to accomplish here.

I wear a “coat of many colors”. It is the reason I am able to negotiate and mediate agreements across a wide chasm of diverse groups. There is a lot of fear around the idea of genetic engineering because of narratives that would present ET’s as so superior to human they should be feared. You might have believed the story that “God” or life stops with human, but nothing supports that claim. Not God as Creator, not the majority of spiritual traditions, not physics, not nature, not anything in fact, except ignorance and a very narrow view of reality. The miasma of genetic heritage most people hold is quite beyond the earth stories we’ve been sold except for maybe that one about the Ark. Regardless of origins, if you’re living on planet earth in a human body, you are an earthling. Good, bad, ugly or Divine, once you are “awake” the choice is up to you.

I will say that it is moving past these stories that allows us to integrate our Galactic heritage and it is an especially important step for starseeds to embrace. You’ll hear of negative aliens and be encouraged to embrace this label or that label. When that happens, remember that none of those labels or storylines exist outside of the True and eternal storyline which is that we are all One. We are both the Created and the Creator. The Director and the Directed. The seer and the seen. No matter where on the infinite field of life you place your perspective, the infinite field remains infinite.

I’m reminded of a quote from the Bible, “truly I tell you, no prophet is without honor except in his own hometown.” This is at the heart of a lot of the angst starseeds and hybrids feel. Your mom, your dad, the people that changed your diaper, your sister, your brother, your best childhood friend, more often than not, no matter how many times you tell them you think you are a starseed or hybrid they’ll deny that claim and may even cause some harm unknowingly in the process. It is actually their role to do such. Because we aren’t living on another planet right now. We are on earth.

Being human, remaining human, and integrating the aspects of our soul’s record that are not, is the whole point. In other words, they are right. And so are you. It is a hard dichotomy to embrace sometimes but finding community with other starseeds and hybrids, helps to support these aspects and gives you the mirror, feedback and understanding that integrating sometimes requires.

I know I’ve held a lot of fear and trauma about being different. I’ve avoided gathering and manifesting situations where I can embrace my differences and meet other hybrids because I am afraid of the same rejection that I got from “humans” for not being “human” enough. It’s funny. My dad always had a hard time with his dual nature, Native dad, German mom, scorned by his rez relatives, harassed by his white city friends. Spirit/physical male/female so many polarities to balance. But the balancing provides the opportunity for growth. Kinda hard to add one more spinning plate when you can’t even stand up straight.

One of the biggest hangups many starseeds and hybrids have is the why me, what’s the point, purpose, what does it mean, what should I be doing…!!!??? The answer is often more simple than we’d like, ask yourself why not you and then, what do you want to do. That’s all there is to it. The Universe doesn’t make mistakes.

We’ll get there. One step at a time, kin, one step at a time.

Shift Message

This is a message from the Galactic Community.

There has been a consensus agreement reached. Contrary to popular opinion, Gaia has reached stabilization of higher dimensions. Integration continues. Time delays will begin to reduce significantly as embodied codekeepers are working in concert while maintaining independent signatures more easily. This will allow for a more fluid and responsible distribution of activations.

An influx of codes are being downloaded. These codes have been approved for seeding real time change and what is considered 5D reality or new earth here, now and obvious. Observations of use of such templates will be ongoing. “New” technologies will be employed to ensure safety and transparency. That is to say, 5D earth realities will be observable by those not yet holding these frequencies, 5D knowledge and goods will pass easily but harm or intent to harm will not enter the boundaries of these new creations and communities.

End message

A whole lot of information has been coming in. Decisions are getting easier to make as the clearings, release of trauma blockages and bindings/vows/covenants fall away. There are a few things of note from my own observations. One is that we were able to “unchain” many Divine Masculine aspects. Some of those who stepped up to receive this transformation would shock you. Let me just say that a new level of Divine Masculine awakening has occurred, Lightbodies have been activated and stabilized and this will continue unfolding as they get used to life without their etheric chains. I think a lot of us that were doing the work, were a little shocked at how stifled our Male counterparts have actually been. I’d say I’m sorry I didn’t realize this earlier, but you already know my heart.

In addition to this, a little birdy told me to expect a “discovery” that will help to fuel a broader shift in the entire population. The aim or intent I am sensing is to reduce harm and squash a certain amount of antagonism and desire to direct inappropriately. Overall, this should help to remove any potentials for exploiting self-discovery which many more will begin embarking on in earnest and this is the main reason it was and is “approved”.

Of note, group level changes that affect the larger global and galactic network, require that many are given parts of larger template codes within their individual field and they then work together to harmonize those frequencies into actual substance and tangible reality. They are distributed to multiple embodiers because they are simply too large (in terms of impact) than one or two or even ten beings should take on individually. It is a harm reduction measure as well. It works slightly different than individually created manifestations. In some respects, I suppose you could liken it to block-chain technology, a form of decentralization and transparency where/when harmonics and creation is occurring beyond one’s home frequency or dimension as it were. In this way, those who are awakened to their creative abilities are able to offer transparency and therefore teachable models for those not quite as far along on their evolutionary or ascension progress.

I’m not one to say any more than needs to be said. I will add to the above with this, there are many who previously did not comprehend, beginning to see now that what we are being offered far exceeds any beneficials related to strictly personal gain.

Many blessings on our journey.

For Real tho’

My mother.

My entire life she has attracted strays of the human variety. She patches them up, lifts their spirits, makes food appear out of thin air to feed their bellies and sends them on their way better than she found them. She’s good at it. She doesn’t take any shit. It really takes a special kind of person to deal with the type of highly dysfunctional people she/we seem best at helping. And she loves to do it, but her heart is about a million times bigger than her pocket book. The resources and scraping and trading we used to get away with twenty years ago is much harder to find these days. Maybe we’re just getting tired. Sending them on their way when jobs that pay enough to get by are scarce, also makes things more difficult.

This is the secret life of most people living in poverty. The exact moment you find yourself with two nickels to rub together you will also find a friend, neighbor or family member that is in desperate need of one. People living in poverty are surrounded by people living in poverty. Some people may be capable of shutting out that reality, and I have often felt the pressure to turn a blind eye and save myself. But “save myself” always seemed to imply entrance into a class of people that are capable of shutting out that reality and the souls that inhabit it. I just haven’t been able to imagine a scenario where I’m walking away from people who are willing to share their last nickel to join the ranks of people who throw away more than they give and never stop to comprehend what that implies as they judge the nickelless. Not that this isn’t changing, it is, but we aren’t out of the woods yet.

I watched my mom cry yesterday, I watched her big old heart leak from her eyes, weeping for the three strays headed her way because she couldn’t say no -again- even though we’re all still living right on the edge of homelessness and she just got the homeless vet with the broken foot sent on his way. And FUUCCCCKKKKKKK  I get why she can’t say no, two little girls under five and a single dad that needs the exact sort of kick in the ass she is gifted in her ability to give but now I have my spirit guides looking at me like, well, little Miss Bridge Builder what are you going to do now? GAhhhhh!!! Is run away an option!!??

Living in this material driven culture with it’s nonstop marketing of pseudo perfection, quick fixes and instant gratification, getting people to see the value in helping someone who is cognitively and emotionally a mess, is not always an easy sell. There is a general misconception that we have systems in place to help and though we do, they are sorely inadequate, in desperate need of upgrades and do not and probably should not, provide the nearly constant guidance some people need. They can and sometimes do, cause more harm than good.

That leaves social networking. I have discovered you don’t get very far unless the audience or receiver comprehends life as fundamentally sacred. You would be appalled at how few people actually hold this belief, this frame of reference. Even relatively spiritually attuned and savvy people will run the calculations in their head before giving money to help the less fortunate. Human life has become classified in a cost/benefit analysis along the same lines as making a decision about which shampoo to buy. “Well this one will make my hair bouncy, but this one will make it smell like strawberries.” ”This person has a 50/50 shot at making it, this one a 70/30.” It is a byproduct of living in a capitalist society, the true psychological and spiritual damage that is resulting still remains undisclosed to or unacknowledged by the vast majority. That narrative has been loud so let me make it crystal clear. The benefit is a world filled with many examples of compassion. The benefit is love. It matters not at all who you help, only that you have a willing heart when they come your way.

Life doesn’t need to be a lottery, some win, some we watch slowly degenerate from lack of food, water or love and pretend that it isn’t happening. We are highly intelligent beings that can actually structure the entire planet towards a more equitable distribution of resources. If it can be organized so efficiently in this unholy way, it sure as shit can be organized in a beneficial way, that’s just logic. We have simply forgotten how to work together, to form basic moral agreements about what we are willing to allow and what we are not.

The number of Americans living in Depression era standards is in the tens of millions. California just surpassed the UK in some or other global economic ranking. It also has the country’s highest homeless population so what the fuck is all that wealth for? What is the purpose? On top of this vast economic inequality we have very real multi-generational trauma, cellular level sludge that is getting kicked up in these energetic fluxes and needs to be healed, not swept under the rug because there’s still way too many people buying into the master race narrative without realizing it.

We live in a society that has fast-tracked itself into a narcissist’s paradise and hitting the reboot button is taking way longer than it should. We are in the timeframe of the great awakening but for all intents and purposes, this great awakening is still very much lacking in progress on the financial end of things and still rife with way too much pomp and circumstance. Do you think the people at the welfare office or the psychiatrist office where the traumatized and vulnerable are being sent are filling them in on the great awakening and their inherent Divinity and Co-Creator abilities? Do you think those traumatized souls even comprehend their own suffering, let alone how to seek a way out of it? I can tell you that they usually don’t. They usually have no idea whatsoever that life can be different.

The intervention usually comes by way of someone like me that speaks the language and isn’t afraid to be around those low vibrations to meet them on their level. Or some other kind soul that can whole heartedly resist the urge to notice or point out errors or “shoulda, couldas” while also being a mirror to the Light within them. Once a person actually senses their own Divinity, the changes tend to unfold naturally over time. This is what is missing from our systems. They provide a strictly material realm type of function and do not recognize or point to spirituality as a solution (and I don’t think we want it to). In my experience these generally are not people who have been exposed to or are aware of things like energy healers or the great awakening so there is a gap to be filled. And gaps need bridges 🙂 so show me how to build this bridge oh wise ones.

The desperate and needy are still flocking to the everyday healers like my mother. The type of caretakers that need help finding resources because our neighbors in need of healing simply do not have anything to exchange but gratitude. Some healers aren’t business savvy, or polished, or comfortable being in front of a camera, but they do know how to love a person back to some base line functioning and stand guard to kick the demons (that like to hang around those vulnerable souls) in the balls.

I’ve said it before but a reminder never hurts, an untold number of Ascended Masters, Bodhisattvas, Angels, and Elders are living among the impoverished right now, waiting, many are sleeping right on the street, just waiting for the awakened to register the level of consciousness that looks past all programming, all physical definitions to peer with their soul and feel, truly feel. I don’t believe that most people are poor because THEIR soul needs the lesson. And the sooner we catch this lesson and start applying it, the sooner we graduate. A certain level of discernment is waiting to be mastered so we can restore relations and peace with each other.

I found this video by Sadhguru and I think it sums up very nicely why it is worth it to keep reaching out, boots on the ground style, to the people living in some of the worst dysfunction and poverty (in whatever form that poverty takes).

Have a Happy Tuesday. May we all know the meaning of the word home when we look into each other’s eyes.

Donations are always welcome, appreciated, and put to good use.


We’re coming up to a GIGANTIC gateway. As Life would have it, I’m on bridge building duty this time. Also as Life would have it, the Universe et al, has been preparing me the last few days. Before I get in to the bridge building portion of this written broadcast, let me take a moment to tell you how excited I am for this weekend. Many things are lining up so awesomely. And when I say awesome, I really mean awesome. I have to snap myself out of the slack-jawed gaping this magnanimous time is presenting.

It’s like being a kid sitting on the ground playing Legos, content with your hundred-piece box of odds and ends when suddenly your mom comes in with a 5000-piece box full of colors, shapes and sizes you didn’t even know Lego made! That’s honestly a good analogy of what we’re looking at here. What will we do with those extra 5000 pieces? Will we give some to the kid down the street who doesn’t have any? Will we create a masterpiece and inspire others? Will we become overwhelmed and stick to what we know, the tried and true reds and greens?

Sitting in the co-captain’s chair of our own evolution is exciting and challenging at the same time. The challenges shouldn’t be minimized but neither should the profound joy at the opportunity in front of us, be ignored or bypassed. This is cool shit, man, quite possibly the coolest. I highly encourage you to embrace the winds of change coming in, the energies and love pouring in from all points of the compass.

We have lots of big brothers and sisters who once got that 5000-piece bonus gift from mom and are equally excited to see what we will do, compare notes and advise without being bossy or intrusive. Like the big sister who is away at college and comes home for a weekend visit. She knows things her youngest sibling still in kindergarten doesn’t, couldn’t, but instead of breaking out the physics textbook to get him up to speed, she gets on the floor and lends a hand allowing the young one to give direction, excited to see the finished product and perhaps know her younger sibling (and thus herself) just a little bit better.

I remember when I started writing publicly, how particular I was to avoid certain phrases or concepts in order not to enflame confusion or fear. I knew that talking too much about the Bible or Christ might scare or trigger those who have been judged harshly or were told they were going to be punished for eternity for avoiding the limiting teachings of many churches. I knew that talking too much about ET’s would scare the pragmatists who follow the seeing at 30fps is believing motto. I knew that talking about sacred geometry, channeling, or Eastern mysticism would cause some of my Christian followers to think I was communing with the devil.

After extensive journeying on the many varied paths, I can tell you in good conscience, they all lead to the same place. They all lead to Love and they all lead to re-connection. Whether you examine it from a scientific standpoint, a mystical standpoint or a religious/dogmatic stand point, when all is said and done, we hear the same song played with different instruments. Coming to understand this fully, perhaps we can embrace a level of maturity that allows us to enjoy the differences we see in each other, to get on the floor and build with all these extra pieces together.

Here’s a pretty stellar example that came my way this week that might help bring this point home. I needed something calming to keep my spirits up (so I didn’t get pissed off at another current economic crisis hitting my family and forget that tomorrow always brings change) so I listened to a reading of the Tao Te Ching. I’ve seen it shared many times but never stopped to partake. About halfway through the first ten “chapters”, I realized the descriptions were lining up abnormally well to my understanding of dimensions, their corresponding numerical labeling and the lessons each “frequency” provides.

I waited with somewhat baited breath for chapter 33. Many of us on the awakening path, the gnostics, and others, often associate the number 33 with Jesus. So take a gander at what this chapter in the Book of the Way, states:

Knowing others is wisdom;
Knowing the self is enlightment.
Mastering others requires force;
Mastering the self needs strength.

He who knows he has enough is rich.
Perseverance is a sign of will power.
He who stays where he is endures.
To die but not to perish is to be eternally present.

If I had to sum up the lessons to be learned from the story of Jesus as Christ, this is it. This is what a thorough examination of the scriptures will reveal. I could crack open my big sister who has been beyond these stars’, physics textbook and it will say the same thing. In a different language.

I think it may be helpful to look at the many spiritual paths in front of us as living instruments, playing the song of songs. I think once we fully grasp this, we can begin more fully to use our instruments to create a new melody to sing back to the Universe, to the Creator. We have a long history of breaking each other’s instruments and for a wide variety of reasons. If we could stop, even momentarily, and play together, the crescendo of our orchestral accord, might finally reach our own ears. It may even be more beautiful than we can possibly fathom.


{Just a side note because it’s too cool not to add… after stopping above, feeling like the writing was complete, I checked my word count as I often do. I decided to look up the number sequence having found in the past that these often provide further clarity. And here is what my research revealed in brief: the word count was 952-

“Correction is mentioned by angel number 952. This is making things right. Your youth has been very expensive. It has cost a lot to many people. You have done damages that will take a long time to repair. It is time for you to correct the wrongs.”

Let us embrace the correcting of our wrongs, forgive each other, heal one another, take these brand new instruments being sent our way and renew humanity, truly, truly, renew ourselves and once renewed, be not afraid to co-create, to write, to play a symphony together, once again.}

Echoes in the Ethers

Song of the Starseeds….

Expanding your consciousness can range from mildly uncomfortable to raging discomfort to nothing special in particular, depending. In general, I have found it to be a blissful and blessed relief. There are times when it is strangely frustrating. Those times when I’m ready to go 5 times the speed of light and I get unpleasantly reminded that I’m still living in slow-mo world.

I can burn with the fire of a thousand suns when I set my mind to it. I can move energy the size of three planets, calm waves of female emotives, cooling the fierceness of transformation. But ask me where I’m going to be living next week and I’m cowering behind fifteen Angels begging for help. The shift is funny that way. Hurry up and wait. Hurry up. Wait. Ok, now go. But….

We’ve become people capable of seeing very far, processing information at speeds I never thought possible. Learning to fine tune and blend the intellectual benefits with the Spiritual Mastery required to use these insights for something bigger than our little selves. I weave in and out of Unity and Independence. Wishing to move freely, but resisting that inner knowing that if I really want to move freely I have to stop peeking around every corner before I get there, have to cease desiring to know every potential before I can choose. Learning to trust the Higher Self that led me through some terribly painful lessons has not been easy. Waiting for the fruition of those lessons to becomes fully applicable and evident. Examining every nook and cranny for what and where the hold up is already, for the experience of experiences I’ve been waiting on, calling in since before I can remember.

I want reunion. I feel it deep in my soul bones, deep in the core of my Being. To be in the presence and live as a tribe among those who can handle the complexity of my diverse travels, memories, lifetimes lived beyond, the truth and fullness of which, even I can barely accept. To live freely among those who can accept that I am a multitude of Beings, I call on a multitude of helpers, that this body itself can channel consciousness and intelligence far exceeding my own…

I wait. Where is this home, this people who won’t mind me traipsing off to the woods to speak with the faeries and tree spirits? Where is this family that won’t mind as I set myself apart for periods of time to learn again the art of levitation? Where is the kin who will know when I need to attend an intergalactic meeting and happily entertain my son while I negotiate on humanity’s behalf, for the tools and insights that may assist us in easing the return from suffering? Where is my intergalactic Sangha? How much longer will we sit behind screens afraid to show our faces to the world as we walk the path of peace and healing? Where is my Trust? Where is my eco-village? Where is my Saturday afternoon volleyball matches, my evenings shooting hoops, my morning weeding and blessing the crops, my moon walks with my Sisters, my afternoon yogis, my high vibe teach the children Maestros, my artisans of the new age producing co-created content that inspires, teaches, advances all, where is my tribe, where is my City of Light?

If you will to be real, show yourselves. I am ready, accepting of my limitations and flaws. Are you? If not, why not? What can I do to help? The path is clear. When will we accept our nakedness and stop layering on the clothes of illusion and need? Can the breath of God between us ever be enough? Can we allow Grace to cover our misdeeds and embrace a new way of living? Of communion? We have been scattered to the ends of the world, to the ends of the cosmos… we fucked up, we are forgiven, it is time to reunite. The window doesn’t stay open forever. Have you forgotten that too?

These are auspicious times for showing what we learned when we travelled beyond earth. So many ready and willing, literally an inch away from moving beyond fourth density. Be brave with your compassion, let it be the song of the Starseeds. The lesson that remains wherever we roam. God is Love, compassion is life.

Happy Renewal

Hello Happy Humans!

We are all looking a little beleaguered at the moment, in need of some refreshment, some re-energizing, some strength. I have to agree with the others, man, you don’t realize how powerful you are, how unbelievably magnificent the truth of your Being actually is. Take a deep breath. I mean it. Take a really deep breath and lean into your astounding presence. So Divine, so much Love, so much tenacity. Each and every being, a fountain of majestic Creation, of Golden Bright Light infusing all it touches. It might be hard to imagine, but it is more real than the banana sitting on your counter.

I remember when I was much younger, not really understanding who I was or what the heck I was doing here. The time in-between epiphanies, communion, advancement were sometimes very long, years even with only short footholds in between the jumping. Those footholds sustained me, those moments of no doubt Divine Presence showing up and guiding, reminding, infusing. WE are all getting a lot better at remembering to hold this space and be each other’s reminders, be each other’s amplifiers, soothers, validators and it is a sight to behold. It has changed everything. We have Mastered the art of keeping the flame burning, burning and being ready and willing to relight, fan, remind any time one of our brothers or sisters ask.

I don’t intend to minimize how deep this purging was. Right in the midst of it, I had to cry out for Mercy. And guess what? Mercy came swiftly to my door and carried me through to the other side. DON’T FORGET TO ASK FOR HELP IF YOU NEED IT!

You can find encouragement 24/7 now if you have the will to look for it and stay on course. Back to yourself, back to Grace, back to wholeness. Joy is everywhere, waiting to be sipped like a cool drink on a hot day. Comfort is at the tips of your very own fingers. Give yourself the gift of a warm hug from God, wrap your arms around yourself, hold tight, say I love you, you Beautiful Divine Being you and then pause for a second and actually relish it. Watch and feel as the Universe pours through you, filling your physical vessel with tangibly felt peace, relief, compassion, LOVE.

Say the words, “happy, happy, happy” right out loud, wherever you are, and watch as little sparkles light up your room, watch as the mood shifts and the energy rises. If you’ve been purging your little heart out and I know we have been, remember to push that little imaginary button in your mind’s eye and flush all that debris out of your field. Transmute all that toxic sludge to something useful or ask to have it utterly removed from your reality and returned to Source to be made brand new.

All of my people are through the portal. But they are walking in like they just passed through the heaviest of storms. This has been one of the easier portals in some respects because there wasn’t the old guard of nasties attempting to stop you. But the purging has been very intense. Deep cleaning and clearing out your closets. Be renewed. Be refreshed now. Be filled with Light. Pat yourself on the back. Jump up and down, you are the strength of Universes, healing the entire cosmos with your choices. Divine Creator Beings, your will to be free of impurity, to return to wholeness deserves a moment’s pause. Sense the Angel at your feet, looking up at you with awe and love and loyalty to your commitment.

Take a breath. Drink a caramel latte and let the Universe say thank you for what you have achieved.

Many continued blessings on our journey Butterflies.